Ahh So Much on My Mind

     If you've read my blog I'm sure you know I live in Chicago and this year we just got a new mayor. No, I'm not going to make this a political post, but with a new mayor comes many changes. Some of those being made to our schools, if you are not form Chicago you may not know that Chicago Public Schools (CPS) cover a huge area, there are many under performing schools in our city, but also many great ones.
   I'm lucky we live in a good district and my children would actually attend a public Montessori which is pretty rare around here. I was very excited about this being a former Montessori teacher myself. Now, though they are going to add two weeks a year and 90 minutes a day to CPS and are not giving schools any extra money, while giving teachers a 45 minute lunch and 60 minute prep period. I think it is great teachers will have extra time to prep and eat that is much needed, but with no extra money I'm not sure who they will have watch the children, which is what worries me. They are going to have to hire people to do this and since there is no money they are going to have to let go teachers, which will increase class size.
    All in all I think it is just a wacky way to do things. Basically they are saying: Add 90 minutes to your school day and two weeks to the school year, you figure out what the kids will do with that extra time, and no we will not give you any extra money and teacher's can not have a raise, are you crazy? Figure it out for yourself we are just telling you have to do it.  So that means kids will go to school 7.5 hours a day and for 90 minutes of that day I'm not sure who will supervise them, plus I just think it is too long for a 5 year old. I don't think I'd be so worried if my kids were older or they had a good plan in place, but now I'm not sure if I will want to send my kids there and we can't afford private school.
     This has brought me to consider......homeschooling or they have CPS virtual school (which is mostly done from home, but meets one day a week). I never thought I would ever consider these options (my husband isn't crazy about the idea but said he would keep an open mind), but I don't want to send my children to a school I am not happy with especially for 7.5 hours everyday, that's almost a full work week. I need to research more about homeschooling because this is an option I never really thought of before. I would love to hear opinions: positive or negative about homeschooling.
     Luckily my oldest has one more year of preschool, so I am going to watch how the grammar schools new day unfolds and how things work out. I know I probably worry too much, but as a parent you want to do what's best for your child and I want to make sure I make the right decision.

Declan

  

    A few nights ago I watched this video on youtube. It was so sad it brought tears to my eyes especially because I was thinking of our son, Declan.
    After having Declan, Jack and I were super excited like most parents. The day before we were leaving the hospital the doctors detected a murmur while listening to his heart. They said it was probably nothing, and all newborns had a murmur for the first day or so but they wanted to check to make sure. So they took him for about an hour, and Jack and I didn't really think much of it since they said it would probably be nothing. When they brought him back they told us they were going to have the cardiologist review the results and talk to us in the morning. They said he had a heart condition and he would explain it to us, and that we shouldn't worry. What kind of thing is that to say to parents of a newborn, of course we were worried, we cried and I was going crazy I didn't want to wait until the morning to hear more, a heart condition sounded pretty serious to me and I wanted to know what it was, but the cardiologist was gone for the day. All we could do is wait and I held Declan trying to hold back tears and hoping that he would be okay and wondering what would be in store for him.
     The next morning we kept asking when the doctor would be in to talk to us, but each time they would say soon and it kept getting later and later. We were both getting extremely upset, how can you tell parents their newborn has a heart condition and just make them wait. Finally after much pestering someone at least told us what it was he has, a bicuspid aortic valve. Immediately Jack started researching it online and finding out any information possible. Basically most people have three valves, but Declan only has two. You can read more about it here or here. We were still upset after reading about it, but at least we knew what it was and read most people will still live long healthy lives with it. Later that afternoon, after what seemed like forever the cardiologist finally came in to speak with us. He made us feel better, he said we will just have to monitor it and one day he will probably need surgery, but there was no way to tell when. Some people live many years and only have one surgery while others may have to go every few years, it just depends on each individual.
     At first every time I would tell people about it I couldn't help, but cry. I couldn't imagine my baby ever having surgery or being in pain. I know though we are very lucky to know about his condition, since it could be deadly without knowing. It is also not what the teenager in the video has, but it got me thinking about Declan's future and how I hope he can do everything he wants.
    Now we go to the cardiologist every 3-6 months to get it checked and luckily his valves have stayed the same size. He just went for a check up today and they are still the same size which is good. If they start shrinking then we have to worry and he may need surgery. For the most part now I don't really think about his heart condition, since it hasn't affected him yet in any way. I know one day it might and there may be need for surgery, but we'll face that road if and when it comes. I am just thankful I know, so that we can monitor it and keep him as safe and healthy as possible. 

Christmas Gifts for the Kids

  


   Although my kids are all still young (3 and under). It seems like they have so much stuff already and we have no place to put it, and I'm scared to see what my house will look like after Christmas. For Liam's first Christmas we only got him a few presents since he was only 10 months old and didn't know the difference. Then when I had Declan I didn't even know what to get him his first Christmas since we had alot of toys from Liam, but I felt bad since Liam was getting so much so I bought him more then I should have. With three boys it's hard to think of things to get when they are little since we have a lot of baby toys already. Now Declan is starting to have things he likes, so it will be easier to think of a few things for him. For Rory I saw a little walker that looked cute and we don't have one and I'm pretty sure by then he may be able to push one, so I think I'll get him that, but not much else.
     This year I decided I'm not going to go overboard. Last year I  kept feeling like maybe I didn't get them enough, and then just kept buying more because I felt guilty like they should have a million presents.  Then on Christmas day it seemed to take all of 5 minutes to open all the gifts and I was still stuck thinking, was that enough, but it was and I know it. I think if you give them 10 gifts or 30 they can open them in only a few minutes.
     My friend was telling me the other day how her aunt used to get their kids 4 gifts every year: Something they want, need, wear, and read. I looked it up online and came across this website here if you want more info or ideas. I thought that it was a super cute idea and to be honest I started my shopping already and think my kids may be too young to understand it this year, but I may try it next year. I think it sounds like a great way to not go overboard, plus your kids know what to expect. No matter what it seems like they end up with too much, half of our kids toys are at their grandparents already because we have no room for them, so  this year I'm thinking less is better and I am going to focus on the few things I know my oldest one really wants and get my younger two a couple of things they will like. What do you guys do at your house for Christmas?

What 18 months is like..

   

    I know they always warn you about the terrible twos, but I'm not sure if anyone told you it all starts at 18 months. Your once cooperative, easy going child turns into a little one with an opinion about everything and wants you to know it. Liam went through this phase as well, and I know that's all it is, but it does make things a little more difficult. Some things Declan no longer likes are putting on a coat, wearing a hat, diaper, pants, you name it he probably doesn't like to wear it. Also he does not like mom or dad to sing or dance so if we do  he yells No, stop until we do, which I know it makes him crazy when we do it but I find it kind of hilarious. He also loves cars and must have one, preferably two in his hands at all times or he runs around saying car until we find them and usually he wants a specific one, but which one that is changes all the time. I know it's him just claiming his independence and also being frustrated since he can't always vocalize what he wants or needs, but it's funny how it seems overnight he changed from a cooperative, easy going guy to a strong willed, independent toddler. Time seems to be racing by in the blink on an eye.

What a mess

     If you read my post here you will know how I feel like I am always changing a dirty diaper. I'm sure most moms feel this way especially if you have more then one in diapers. Moms of multiples I don't know how you do it: diapers at the same time, everyone going through the same stages at once, you guys amaze me. Anyways, I've never had this problem before with a kid. It seems at least once a day Rory poops all over himself. I mean like out of his diaper and all over his body. Usually I just clean him off and throw him in the tub to wash him off a bit. I've never had this problem before with my other kids. I'm not sure if he just moves his diaper around or what because it seems to be on him fine when I check. The worst is when he does it and we're out because it is a huge mess to clean. I've tried different brands, sizes, I'm just not sure what the deal is, I never had this happen so often. Any other moms have this same problem or is it just me?

What an hour can do for a girl

    Last night my mom came over like she does on most Thursdays,which is super nice of her. Usually I stay home and just try to get some extra stuff done because I know it's hard for her to be alone with 3 little ones since she has arthritis in her knees. She always tells me to go, if  I need to run errands to go ahead, but I usually don't because I feel bad. Yesterday though I finally did, I went to Target for a little over an hour and it was so nice to be able to relax and shop alone, without having to rush because someone is crabby or tired. I love being with my little guys, but sometimes an hour away is all I need to feel refreshed. These last few days have been stressful with lots of tantrums and tears, and mommy was starting to get a bit crabby herself, but now all seems better. Even though today was still filled with lots of crying I feel a little more relaxed about it. Declan is totally going through this clingy mommy phase right now that I know in a few years I will miss, but all he wants me to do is hold him all the time otherwise he cries and cries, you get the picture. Plus, yesterday Liam had a fit and refused to go to his swimming class and I wasn't in the mood to make him since I take everyone with it's not worth it if he's not cooperating, and then when it was too late to go he decided he wanted to go and was upset it was over. I'm sure you know how those days are when there doesn't seem to be a moment in the day where someone is not crying. So it was nice to get out even if it was just for an hour trip to Target. I came home and my mom said everyone was great and happy the whole time I was gone. Then as soon as I walked in Declan started crying again. Don't you love how they save their best behavior for you :)

                               The best picture we could get of them in their Halloween pjs, we may have to try again. 

                               I like to think Rory is just making a scary face.

I think fall is back

     While the weather has been beautiful in Chicago, I know it won't last long, but we're enjoying it while it's here. Today was a rainy day though and it reminds me of the cold weather to come. In the back of my mind I am thinking about all the cold, rainy, and snowy days ahead. I read it's suppose to be the worst Chicago winter in a long time, so I need to do some preparing because unless we have some activities to do indoors, there's going to be 3 crazy kids and one crabby mommy.
     So I plan on making a trip to the store soon to buy some stuff and start getting some projects and activities ready. I'll be posting what I come up with, but I'd love to hear any of your ideas especially for toddlers since most of the stuff I'm familiar with is for preschool age kids.  What do use guys have planned for the winter months?

Jogging Stroller

     If you've been with me from the beginning, you may remember I posted about how I ordered a Phil and Teds double jogging stroller a few months ago. This was an expensive purchase for us, but we decided it would hopefully be worth it. As soon as we put it together we realized the front wheel was broke, so I called them and they were nice and said they would send a new one out, so we waited and waited, but nothing came. So after 3 weeks I called again and they apologized and said they were on back order, but they would send them as soon as they could. They were really nice, but I was annoyed since we had it for a month and couldn't use it.
   So finally over three months later we got the tire and have been able to use our stroller. I am so glad we got one, I'm still not sure if it's worth all the money but it has made my like easier. It's super light and easy to maneuver. I have actually started running after I take Liam to school. I never thought I would run I hate running, but my husband and I went together a couple times and I liked that I was able to get some exercise done while the kids were up.  Plus I like being able to go with my husband and it helps keep me motivated. I will tell you running is one of the hardest things I've ever done, and it's probably more like jogging and I don't last long, but I feel good after I do it and it's a nice change to my regular workout.  Each time I run I try to go a little further then I did before and I am actually starting to enjoy it. Now I just wish we would have gotten a jogging stroller sooner. For any moms out there thinking of getting a jogging stroller I would definitely recommend it and if you're anything like me and thought you could never run I'm sure you can even if its for a few blocks at first.

       Don't mind the mess in the background I just wanted to give you an idea of what it looked like.

Before Dinner Distractions

  I told you how I always feel like while I'm cooking it's a disaster. Someone is always crying or hanging on me or all of a sudden they need something. So I have been trying to come up with some activities the kids can sit down and do, so things are not so chaotic.  I saw this on Pinterest with a strainer and pipe cleaners. We didn't have pipe cleaners so I used straws, which worked but I know pipe cleaners will work better. Liam loved doing this, it was a little too hard for Declan but he tried and watched Liam. I plan on getting some pipe cleaners next time I'm at the store since they liked it. I would love to hear if you have some ideas as well.

Montessori Style Number Cards

     Last week I was telling you guys how I felt bad about not sending Liam ti a Montessori school. After thinking about it for a while I decided that I would just try to do more Montessori style work with him at home while the younger ones were napping, since I used to be a teacher.
    I didn't have time to get to the store yet, so I made some Halloween number cards with what we had at home. All you need is card stock, stickers, scissors, and a marker. Simply cut about 1/4 off the top so they are all the same size. Write numbers 1-10 on the smaller cards and place 1-10 stickers on the larger cards, and then you are done. Have your child line up the numbers in the correct order, then pick a card and count how many stickers are on it and place it under the correct number. If your child wants more to do after that you can have them make their own number card book by writing numbers and placing stickers or stamps on their card. Super easy to do, I made mine in 20 minutes while Liam was at preschool and when he came home we did them together. He thought they were super fun. As I make more works for Liam I will continue to post them, so stay tuned.

What having 3 has been like for me

Before I had 3 kids I was constantly asking moms how hard it was to have 3, I did the same before my second as well. So I thought I'd share with you what my life has been like so far as a mom of 3. Rory was a surprise and I was kind of nervous when I found out because him and Declan were only going to be a year apart, in my eyes Declan was still a baby. Going from 1 to 2 kids was hard, not as hard as I thought it would be, but if you think you barely have free time with 1, try 2. Declan was an easy baby though, and Liam was 2 when I had him and very independent and well spoken.
Everyone told me going from 1 to 2 was much harder then 2 to 3. Just to let you know now my feelings are the opposite. After I had Rory I was super emotional I guess I had the baby blues, you are always emotional after a pregnancy, but with my last one it was much worse. Once Jack went back to work everything seemed overwhelming. Just leaving the house seemed to be a major task and required a huge double stroller or two trips to the car plus I still was sore from the c-section and Declan wanted to be held more. When I had Declan I was lucky, we had a sit and stand stroller but barely used it since Liam preferred to walk. With Declan being just a little over one he's not yet ready to walk on his own when we're going somewhere, he was only walking for 3 weeks before Rory was born.
My husband goes to school 3 mornings a week and works 2pm-10:30pm, so days he works I'm pretty much on my own all day. In the beginning I was lucky enough to have an awesome mom and mother-in-law who would come by after work to help me out and I'm not sure what I would have done without them. In the beginning it seemed every time I put Rory down he would scream and he wanted to breastfeed constantly which was fine when Jack was here, but I couldn't spend an hour feeding him then 30 minutes later he'd want to eat again. My doctor said to wait at least 2 hours between feeding, but how can I let a little baby cry for over an hour. I ended up supplementing with formula and that kept him full longer. Then I stopped breastfeeding at 8 weeks, which I still feel bad about I breastfed for 6 months with my other sons, but the stress it was putting on me and Rory just wasn't worth it to me. Once I did go to formula he seemed full longer and stopped crying as much, and I felt less stressed, maybe I just wasn't producing enough milk.
     Now 3 1/2 months later we are in more of a routine and things have gotten easier. Don't get me wrong it still takes a good 20 minutes or so to leave the house on my own with them. We have some really great days and some that are harder. I think for me the hardest part was Declan and Rory being so close in age because Declan still needs help alot. Also I'll admit Declan still gets a bottle before nap and bedtime and his  pacifier when he sleeps, taking these things away just seemed too hard since he sees Rory have the all the time and I figure it's not really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things .My mom still comes to help 1-2 night a week which I love her for and my husband is an amazing father that plays with the boys whenever he gets a chance, so I'm pretty lucky.
     Although it's been hard at times, I wouldn't change any of it for the world.  Just thinking about the three of them brings tears of joy to my eyes.  Now there are times I never want to put Rory down because I know how fast the time goes and I don't want to miss any of it.  When I feel stressed I try to remind myself how quickly the time goes and to enjoy just spending time with them and not worry about other things that need to get done.
    Will there ever be a number 4?  Who knows, it is too soon to tell now.  People say when you are done you know, but I really don't know, I'm not sure how you really know that when the time comes maybe I will. Since I've had a c-section the doctor always asks if I want my tubes tied, but I always say no that seems so final plus how can I know I don't want anymore kids before I even have this baby?  If  we do have another kid it won't be for a few more years when everyone is more independent. Only time can tell. Any moms out there I'd love to here opinions/advice of how you felt when adding another to the bunch and how things have been. Moms of 4 or more let me know how you feel the difference was from 3 to 4+. Thanks I look forward to your comments:)

Goodnight

Sometimes I just hate putting him down because I know this time goes by so fast.

What a day

Every morning when I wake up I hope to be a better mom then I was the day before. More patient, understanding, and to spend more quality time with my children instead of worrying about cleaning or other things that can wait. I sometimes find the patience I had as a teacher I no longer have for my own children.  Maybe it's being asked the same question for the 1000th time, while one child wants a snack and the other is crying, or just the feeling you just can't make everyone happy, or the fact that you just finished cleaning and the house is already a mess again, who knows. While I was putting Declan down for his nap Liam decided he wanted to go in his playroom (which is in our basement) to get something and the doorknob came off so he tries to put it back on and jammed the piece too far back to reattach it. I came down and tried to fix it (all our tools were in the basement and my husband was at work), but I was unable to.  So I told Liam he had to nap/rest in our room and he started screaming and crying because usually he naps in his playroom (I tried having him and Declan nap in their room together, but no one ever slept) and he didn't like this change of plans. After a day of him screaming and crying all day about every little thing, I lost it.  I know it was just an accident, but it was just one more thing to add to my day and now he was crying because he couldn't sleep in his playroom (most of the time he doesn't sleep anyways).  I was angry so I yelled at him and then I felt guilty because I know it was just an accident and the reason it happened was because he was just trying to fix it.  I know as parents we all have these moments where we get angry, we make mistakes. I told him I was sorry, but I still feel guilty.  Then I started thinking I would never yell at a child in my class like that, is that just because I as I teacher I knew it wasn't acceptable?  Luckily my husband's friend stopped by and after borrowing tools from the neighbor, about 30 minutes later he got it open. So tomorrow I will try to do better then today, and I guess the guilt is just part of the parenting package.

Good morning: )

I love waking up to these happy faces:)