Tuesday, July 26, 2011
What having 3 has been like for me
Everyone told me going from 1 to 2 was much harder then 2 to 3. Just to let you know now my feelings are the opposite. After I had Rory I was super emotional I guess I had the baby blues, you are always emotional after a pregnancy, but with my last one it was much worse. Once Jack went back to work everything seemed overwhelming. Just leaving the house seemed to be a major task and required a huge double stroller or two trips to the car plus I still was sore from the c-section and Declan wanted to be held more. When I had Declan I was lucky, we had a sit and stand stroller but barely used it since Liam preferred to walk. With Declan being just a little over one he's not yet ready to walk on his own when we're going somewhere, he was only walking for 3 weeks before Rory was born.
My husband goes to school 3 mornings a week and works 2pm-10:30pm, so days he works I'm pretty much on my own all day. In the beginning I was lucky enough to have an awesome mom and mother-in-law who would come by after work to help me out and I'm not sure what I would have done without them. In the beginning it seemed every time I put Rory down he would scream and he wanted to breastfeed constantly which was fine when Jack was here, but I couldn't spend an hour feeding him then 30 minutes later he'd want to eat again. My doctor said to wait at least 2 hours between feeding, but how can I let a little baby cry for over an hour. I ended up supplementing with formula and that kept him full longer. Then I stopped breastfeeding at 8 weeks, which I still feel bad about I breastfed for 6 months with my other sons, but the stress it was putting on me and Rory just wasn't worth it to me. Once I did go to formula he seemed full longer and stopped crying as much, and I felt less stressed, maybe I just wasn't producing enough milk.
Now 3 1/2 months later we are in more of a routine and things have gotten easier. Don't get me wrong it still takes a good 20 minutes or so to leave the house on my own with them. We have some really great days and some that are harder. I think for me the hardest part was Declan and Rory being so close in age because Declan still needs help alot. Also I'll admit Declan still gets a bottle before nap and bedtime and his pacifier when he sleeps, taking these things away just seemed too hard since he sees Rory have the all the time and I figure it's not really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things .My mom still comes to help 1-2 night a week which I love her for and my husband is an amazing father that plays with the boys whenever he gets a chance, so I'm pretty lucky.
Although it's been hard at times, I wouldn't change any of it for the world. Just thinking about the three of them brings tears of joy to my eyes. Now there are times I never want to put Rory down because I know how fast the time goes and I don't want to miss any of it. When I feel stressed I try to remind myself how quickly the time goes and to enjoy just spending time with them and not worry about other things that need to get done.
Will there ever be a number 4? Who knows, it is too soon to tell now. People say when you are done you know, but I really don't know, I'm not sure how you really know that when the time comes maybe I will. Since I've had a c-section the doctor always asks if I want my tubes tied, but I always say no that seems so final plus how can I know I don't want anymore kids before I even have this baby? If we do have another kid it won't be for a few more years when everyone is more independent. Only time can tell. Any moms out there I'd love to here opinions/advice of how you felt when adding another to the bunch and how things have been. Moms of 4 or more let me know how you feel the difference was from 3 to 4+. Thanks I look forward to your comments:)